I was watching The Soup on E! and Joel McHale had a clip about genital age. Seems Dr. Oz has a quiz, which can be found on his website that provides the RealAge of your genitals. The woman in the clip was 43 and her vagina’s RealAge was 73. The clip made The Soup because of the woman’s face. (I felt really bad for her, actually.) Anyway, my husband and I got a big kick out of watching the clip, so I wanted to see the actual show. Thank goodness for reruns. We found it, watched it, and since then have been watching the shows instead of watching Daily Show reruns. (WHY is Jon Stewart on vacation so much?!?)

Dr. Oz spends a lot of time talking about aging. Specifically, how you can avoid aging. We saw another show this week — it aired last week; gotta love time shifting — about skin and what you can learn by looking at it. During the taping, Dr. Oz asked everyone to take off their makeup. The show really hit home because it made me aware of the fact that I am probably the only woman in America who does not wear makeup. I don’t own concealer. I don’t own liquid makeup. I don’t wear eye shadow. My beauty routine consists of moisturizer with a high SPF, a little lipstick, and some blush if I am planning on being out in public. Most days I go with the moisturizer and nothing else. This is something I’d like to change. It’s not the first time that I’ve said this. Every six or 12 months I get on a “I could be prettier” kick and try to wear makeup. The thing that keeps this from happening is my sensitive skin and desire to avoid parabens and other toxic chemicals. (And, let’s be honest here: I’m lazy.)

This weekend in between going to game night, making up birthday party favors, and throwing an eight-year-old’s birthday party, I started investigating cosmetics. Again, I’ve done this in the past, but as the Campaign for Safer Cosmetics has found: It’s pretty hard to steer clear of bad stuff in the products that make us pretty. According to the organization, “The average American uses about 10 personal care products a day resulting in exposure to more than 100 unique chemicals. The vast majority of the roughly 12,500 chemicals used by the $50 billion beauty industry have never been assessed for safety.”

I’m hoping that the Safe Cosmetics Act of 2011 (H.R.2359), introduced on June 24, will help to change that, but until then what’s a girl to do? One option: Check the Environmental Working Group’s Skin Deep database. Checking the database actually made me feel a little better about the mascara I use, which scored a 3 out of 10 (with 10 being the most dangerous) on the guide. Still, I am going to try the Coastal Creations mascara, which scored a 1 out of 10 because yes, it’s important to feel pretty, but it’s important to be healthy, too.

But wait, I have totally digressed! I started off talking about Dr. Oz and skin and what you can learn from looking at it without makeup. Want to know what I learned? My skin is in pretty good shape. I’m thinking all that sunscreen and my giant “spinster hats” (as my friends have dubbed them) is the reason. That didn’t stop me from ordering $100 worth of cosmetics this evening, though. I’m looking forward to messing around with it.

M.A.C. Cosmetics. For every six pieces of M.A.C packaging that you send back to the company, you’ll receive a free lipstick via its Back to M.A.C. program. Yes, you have to mail it in, but the packages are pretty light so it shouldn’t cost too much — or create too large of a carbon footprint.

Origins. This company rocks. It just does. Aside from the fact that many of the products are organic and free-trade and are rated pretty solidly on the Skin Deep Cosmetics Database, they are willing to take back any and all cosmetics packaging for recycling or energy recovery. (Plus, you’ll take home a free sample of an Origins product.)

Aveda. While you can’t drop off your product bottles, the company will take back caps — all your caps, actually. From the website: “This includes caps that twist on with a threaded neck such as caps on shampoo, water, soda, milk and other beverage bottles, flip top caps on tubes and food product bottles (such as ketchup and mayonnaise), laundry detergents and some jar lids such as peanut butter.” Yes, you’ll have to get your school involved, but it’s such a good program!

EcoTools. When brushes go bad — or hand creams or body washes get old — you don’t have to throw them out. According to the company’s site, you can turn in old items and get coupons for an EcoTools equivalent. From the site: “For each item turned in, participants will receive a coupon for a free EcoTools alternative! [Up to $7.99 value, limit 2 coupons per person, per household]. To continue to show respect to the earth, items collected will be recycled.” Nice, right?

Bond No. 9. Got old perfume bottles? Heading to New York City? While you’re there you can bring your old bottles to the company’s store and it will take them for recycling and give you a free purse spray.

Know of any programs I’ve missed? Please let me know. Up until now what did you do with your old bottles, sticks and tubes?

Photo credit: Photo by Timothy Fadek | A Girl's Gotta Spa! in Patchogue.

I was reading a story in today’s Newsday. (Well, ExploreLI, since I can’t read Newsday anymore since it ceased being free online.) The story, Ribbons and Curls at Spas for Girls, profiled a local spa designed just for little girls. Bathrobes and pedicures and pink lemonade in Champagne glasses. For $180, the salon will even pick your child up in a stretch limo and roll out a red carpet when she arrives.

I am probably going to be very unpopular when I say this but: bah-humbug! Don’t get me wrong. I am not against little girls getting their nails done. (Well, that’s not 100 percent true. I am against girls younger than four getting their nails done.) I am, however, against the sexualization and adult treatment of those girls. To me, giving a little girl the same experience that should be reserved for something special like a first school dance or being in a wedding is just wrong. You want to give your kid a manicure or bring her with you when you get yours? Great, but does a six-year-old really need to sip a drink out of a Champagne flute while someone does her toes? I’m thinking not. I feel the same way about facials, hair highlighting, tight and/or trampy clothing, and belly shirts. They should be reserved for the teenage years. Let little girls be little girls. Still, the woman who came up with the idea is laughing all the way to the bank.

Of course, experience aside, most nail polishes and cosmetics contain lots of chemicals — the most common are toluene, formaldehyde, and dibutyl phthalate (DBP), which are carcinogens. Toluene or methylbenzen, which is found in paint thinners and helps nail polish look smooth and shiny, can cause headaches and neurological damage. Formaldehyde is the stuff that dead bodies are preserved in. It’s an anti-fungal agent, and extremely toxic to humans. Dibutyl phthalate (DBP) is the one that makes me the maddest. It’s been banned for use in cosmetics as well as children’s toys by the European Union since it can cause birth defects. We still allow it to be used here in the States, although thankfully most major companies have eliminated it from their products. You can find out if the polish your salon uses is safe for kids by checking out the Environmental Working Group’s Skin Deep Cosmetics Safety Database.

And since you’re probably wondering: Yes, my big girl gets her nails done. I buy kid-safe nail polished from my local Whole Foods, which she loves. Plenty of pretty colors (no reds, as per Daddy), and skin-safe top and base coat, too. When she does get her nails done she’s not allowed to have her cuticles pushed or cut, and we bring all our own tools for an added level of safety. (THAT is a whole other issue — and blog post.)

How do you feel about makeup, spas, and nails for little girls? I’d like to know.